Sunday, February 11, 2007

Life Is An Orgy, Bring Plenty Of Lube

Seriously though, life is just like an orgy. We all have our roles to play, and while we may often feel stuck in the role we find ourselves in we are both allowed and encouraged to switch it up any time we want to. Maybe you're the center of attention, that every-hole-and-appendage-engaged kind of person who's having a great time but rarely gets a breather. Perhaps you're that sample-platter sort who wanders the room bouncing from one titillation to the next, having a great time without getting too heavily involved in any one scene. Maybe, just maybe, you're that obscenely hot couple who only play with each other in the public venue, giving the rest of us something to enjoy and look forward to. The options are as limitless as the number of positions you can get into with six other folks who's names you most likely didn't bother asking.

And then there's that guy sitting in the corner masturbating. Well trying to masturbate anyway, but coke dick is often limp and unresponsive. While anyone who's thoroughly enjoyed ShortBus can tell you that voyeurism is a form of participation, being so cranked up on party favors that you miss the show entirely is no way to live. Don't be that guy, he's a buzz kill.

In the sweaty, grunting pile of bodies that is life it can be easy to think that the role we find ourselves in is set in stone, but if you allow it, changing positions can be as simple as telling that hot guy (and his hot friend) to pull out and bend over, because it's your turn to lay some proverbial pipe.

After all, do anything for too long and you're bound to start chaffing no matter how good the lube is.

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